Makali has been the name of my alter-ego for almost as long as I've been online. Makali first surfaced in 1994 when I was 15, and as my personality matured and my needs, priorities, insecurities, and interests developed, so Makali's appearance and character evolved, as expressions or explorations of myself and the places and social situations I found myself in.
Makali is something between a cat and a man. When I was younger, I had something of a romantic view of the internet, with the idea that you can be anyone or anything you like, and at the time I thought a cat was pretty cool thing to be. In cartoons, cat-people were smart, nimble, powerful, graceful, or silly and fun. With hindsight I now know that the Thundercats was a pretty crappy cartoon, but back then it was awesome. Besides, wheeled warrior's a hard act to pull off, and who ever wanted to be a smurf?
In my copious spare time, on weekends, whenever I'm socialising online. Makali is purely an online identity – I don't need an avatar to represent me in real life just yet.
I use Makali in all kinds of places online. From as little as an IM username, to a full-blown role-play/gaming character, and everything in between.
We humans make a lot of assumptions based on appearance; sometimes helpful, sometimes not. We all know people who eat like horses and are annoyingly slender, and people who eat little but just can't seem to shift those extra pounds. We've all seen photos with "myspace angles"; hiding, revealing, stretching the truth. An avatar on the other hand tells you nothing about what a person looks like, but can tell you much more about what a person is like. Far from hiding who you really are, an avatar can broadcast your personality.
I got to thinking about how we socialise online, about how our identities are constructed - intentionally or otherwise. Makali's a designed identity, an avatar. He's made to play on stereotypes in order to cue you to my interests and personality, if only enough for you to decide whether you want to approach me socially. Cats have lots of well-known personality traits and stereotypes, so they're a great shortcut. If nothing else, a cat avatar says, "Hey, this guy's a bit weird and likes cats", which is more than most photos of me give away.
Let's face it: it's pretty weird, but really, why not? There's an element of post-humanism to it; the idea that bodies are something to be overcome, especially online. Why restrict my online appearance to the same limits as the real world? Online I can choose a form that cannot be taken instantly at face value, or I can choose a form and exploit the preconceptions and stereotypes that apply to it, a form that stands out and encourages re-evaluation on my own terms; it's a step in the same direction as traditional punk or goth garb. It says "I am not just a piece of meat (I'm also a bit weird and I like cats)."
The thing I worry the most about this page and Makali in general is that people might think I'm serious about it all. I don't really think I'm a cat, I don't believe in flying toasters or even all that much about designed identity. People are hard to fool, and there's very little benefit in doing it long-term, especially socially. Makali's a conversation-starter or an ice-breaker, but the real me is what persists, the person that people get to know over time. I chose a cat because I like them and some of the stereotypes we have for cats fit the aspects of my personality that I want to project, but everyone who knows me at all well knows that like all stereotypes, they don't fit precisely (and depending on my mood, don't fit at all).
Finally, one thing Makali isn't, is a good name – for all my talk of designed identity, it seems silly to not have thought about my name at all, and yet it's meaningless and inoffensive enough that I've come to accept it. It's me, but not me, and that sounds about right for an avatar.